More of What You Want, Less of What You Don't

Sounds so easy!!! I don’t want to be stressed, tired, bored, smoking, drinking, angry and so on.

This mental chatter is in itself a drain. A total brain drain and takes up too much time. Time we know we want to be spending do something else, something more, something better.

I know it seems too simple, I know!!! And at the same time it’s a profound way I started shaping my day to day life more around the things I most wanted to do, how I desperately wanted to be living on the daily, and I can’t be more plain than to tell you I just wasn’t doing it.

After spending so much time saying to myself: I don’t want to eat like crap, I don’t want to feel like crap, I don’t want all these distractions, I don’t want to smoke, I don’t want to drink so much, I don’t want to smoke weed and binge watch old TV shows because I can’t think of anything else other than what I don’t want to do anymore!

Creating my daily life around what I needed to do, to do the things I most wanted to do became my catalyst for change.

As I head toward my 45th birthday this weekend, I can appreciate the power of practicing this simple technique everyday for a couple years now. It took me a bit to get here and hopefully by sharing my experience it can help energize yours towards what YOU most want to be doing a little faster and easier - I’m sharing a super shortcut here!

So this is what I do; when I think of something I don’t want to be doing or feel guilty about the thing I am doing that I don’t think I should be doing, I stop and take a moment to flip that bitch around on itself!

First, if I don’t like what I’m doing what is the first thing that comes to mind that I’d like or love to be doing instead? Right now. Then I think of that thing in a mantra(a short phrase or word that encompasses the positive thought) Dance, dance, dance for instance.

If I can do that now, I do it. If I can’t, I take a few moments to think about when I can do it and how I want to do it. Do I want to go to a dance class, a dance club, or put on some music right now and dance around my living room like Tom Cruise in Risky Business?

This helped me so much when I quit smoking. When I decided I wanted to quit, I spent so much time fixated on not wanting to smoke, which just made me want to smoke more. When I switched my thought pattern to what else would I like to be doing, it occured to me I wanted to breathe more deeply and freely. Then I thought of activities I loved doing or wanted to try that would support this thought more. I came up with hiking, yoga, and meditation and then looked at a calendar and asked myself when I wanted to do these things. Picking a day hike for the weekend, time to set aside for morning meditation, and since I had a yoga schedule from the neighborhood on the fridge, a couple yoga classes to go to starting the next week.

The simplicity is exquisite. If you are thinking about something, anything that you don’t want, take a moment to think about what it is you would like to be doing instead. Breathe into that experience, go to a calendar and see when you can start doing it if you can’t do it right now. Try making it a regular part of your life for 90 days - this gives enough time to really find the activities you love and adjust if it’s not the right fit. As well as a little room to slack and come back. See if it is really something you want to do and you’re doing it more, moving away from the thing you no longer enjoy doing. Give yourself time to really have the time of your life!

  1. Thing of something you want to be doing.
  2. Do it! Do it now. Plan to do it. Schedule it in a calendar with a reminder. Do it!
  3. Keep doing it until you suddenly realize you're doing something you really enjoy and haven't thought about that old worn out thing you were so over!

What’s one thing you’d like to be doing? When do you want to start doing it? Please share in the comments to inspire others.

If you like this video and found it helpful, let me know in the comments as well, and questions are always welcome here or pm me and I’ll do my best to answer and respond. Join my email list here to get the insiders scoop on new videos, programs, talks, and workshops.

Until next time, Cheers!